|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
HeartbeatMy heart beats it stutters, then beats again. Faster this time, though, because of the way you hurt me. Beats faster because of the anger and the pain.
Beat b be beat ..beat.beat.
Pieces of me are falling away; I can't make them stay in place anymore. You chisel away more of my heart with every lie,
Every justification you make for your actions,
Every time you hide something from me,
And I wonder how many more hits I can take. How many more times I can be talked out of leaving.
One more day, week, month, year? Jesus you tie me in knots.
Every time, its baby I'll do better. And today it was I don't want to hurt you anymore. Then why are you?
Why must we do this over and over again?
Why do I have to cry to get your attention?
Why can't you tell me how you're feeling?
B be beat.
This won't be easy. I won't make it easy.
I'm worth more than this, worth more than the way you've skated by through these yea
I Miss YouI'll ignore you and pretend you dont exist
until you come back to me
until your drugs wear off
and you look at me soberly
and while i may seem so cold
its easier to just ignore you and carry through
cause i deserve more
than just an empty shell of you
i hate that you check out
i hate that you slur your words
i hate that you dont care how i feel about it
because you so like the blur
i understand about taking the edge off
trust me, i really do
but you have so much youre missing
and i, i just miss you
im tired of repeating myself
at least twice with every word i say
im tired of thinking i'll just do it myself
cause its easier and faster that way
i hate to keep asking
because you dont ever listen
youre wasting money and wasting away
youre sort of just existing
RumBottle to the lips
your convictions are stronger now
now that you can taste it
and in it you can drown
another shot for the tears
so that everything goes numb
so i can stop hating
so i can stop feeling dumb
i want to drown out this life
so i can stop hating me
so i can stop hating you
so i can stop...and just be
no more tears, no more pain
i dont have to care
and even when i fall
no one will have to be there
so drink it up, enjoy
the taste gets better as you go
one more shot, one more taste
down & down you'll go
You Made MeI'm only paranoid because you make me..
cause you take me, break me, and hate me.
I'm only here cause you brought me...
cause you caught me, fought me, & taught me.
I'm only around cause you like it...
that I fight it, & that I cant right it.
I only speak when you try to "get" me...
when you bet me, let me, & then forget me.
I only breathe cause you're waiting...
cause you're watching, wishing, paying.
I'll only leave cause you've decided its not worth trying...
not worth lying, crying, or slowly dying.
And I'll only remember because you changed me...
cause of the violence, and the love, cause you made me...
Im waiting for the things that you promised
Waiting for the words to ring true
Waiting for you to see your responsibility
For you to comprehend and come through
I keep hoping you'll see how im feeling
Keep trying to think that you'll change
And sometimes you acknowledge the problems
but its never corrected, its always the same
And i'm feeling so angry and crazy
I hate how you have that control
Im still waiting, watching, loving
Still filled with such false hope.
Breaking Freei'm screaming inside
...from trying to hide and break free
all at the same time
i'm screaming inside
...from feeling so alive and afraid
all at the same time
i'm trying to break free
of my self-made chains
but its harder than it seems
i wasnt prepared for the pains
and i'm trying to break free
cause i know its a better world
but i've been so broken and afraid
still feel like that little girl
i'm so afraid of what i'm feeling
though its amazing in itself
so afraid but liberated
from this self-made hell
and i'm not sure that i want this
even though it feels so right
i dont know why i'm fighting
but i wont give up the fight
Secretssecrets...so many secrets here
so many things held in check
i wont shed a single tear
secrets...so many left unsaid
things i cant bring myself to tell you
places i was willingly led
secrets...that would hurt you about me
the scars that lie inside
the craving to feel, the need
secrets...that you've heard but dont believe
the ones i turn around to lies
so as to spare you the grief
secrets...that showed the hope lost long ago
looking to see if i'm still here
things i'd never show
secrets...i've got thousands left
things i've yet to tell you
but im afraid i'll run out of breath.
Failuredont you think i remember?
dont you think i recall?
when you were there, breaking
and i just let the pieces fall?
dont you think that i felt it?
dont you think that i saw you cry?
when you were there, bleeding
and i turned my back, i lied.
dont you think that it hurt me?
dont you think that i died?
when you were there, hurting
and i just tried to hide.
dont you think that it hurt?
dont you think that i know?
when you were there, drowning
and i just let you go.
dont you think that i remember?
dont you think that i regret?
when you were dying there
and i turned away, i left.
dont you think i loved you?
dont you think i cared?
when you were being broken down
and to move i was too scared.
Dont you think i recall?
dont you thinnk i understand?
when you were there, falling
and i wouldnt help you stand/
Fairthey told me it would be ok...and that they wouldnt care...but they lied to my face...for they all stopped and stared...some part of me said to run...but my pride took over and i stayed...some little part of me was scared...but i made that voice fade...someone started laughing...and i felt my face turn red...inside i was bleeding...from the cuts from the words they said...no one always speaks truth...no one never lies..and then they see you as having weakness...if you break down and cry...the most lonely i ever felt...was in that crowded room...where i could identify with no one...it felt like a crowded tomb...where everyone's there but no ones alive...where they're all living...but they've all died inside...and theyre bringing me down with them...they want what the no longer have...a soul, their own personality...they want the things they lack...and the lonliness just grows greater...the emptiness creates a bigger hole...adn the people i surround myself with...their hearts are just so
Skin.I love the way life leaves its mark on our bodies.
Every laugh and smile etched in the crinkles around your eyes and mouth;
Those tan-lines the time you forgot about sunscreen
Because you were so hell-bent on reaching that mountain peak
Or when you just became lost in the gentle lap of waves at the shore;
The scars you got skateboarding in the park at summer dusk
Or when life became pain and it was your only release.
Our bodies are a record of our memories and experiences
They are our travel journals and emotional diaries
Our delicate armour to the elements.
And no matter its colour, its stature, if it's not quite intact
If you sometimes think it takes up too much space, or if it has pointy corners
Your body is the vessel for your soul, and every wonderful facet of who you are
Sparkles from the surface of your skin.
Skin that may grow to be wrinkled, tanned, scarred, well lived-in
Although not always embraced by you the way that others embrace it.
Take the time to explore the s
Mystic FlowMystic Flow
a secret and a promise.
All I have to do
is follow the river.
The human condition of wanting to be everythingI feel as though I am exhausting
The excess skin around
in loose shadows
Across my cheekbones like
And whilst I find myself
To draw open the blinds
Because the light
is too bright
And I really can’t handle
The pane of the sky
With its obnoxious
glaring at me
With such a joyful expression
I know that lately
I am burning myself out
That I consume one too many
Cans of soda and energy drinks
At 2.45 AM
When the rest of the world
Is static in a hushed
Whilst I frantically try
To achieve something
Is too much
Or rather too
An existence for me
So I will continue
In order to
Try and destroy myself
Enough so that
I can be w h o l e
ένα μυστικό και μια υπόσχεση.
Το μόνο που έχω να κάνω
είναι να ακολουθήσω το ποτάμι.
The scarsLife hurts us
It causes us to bleed
Time can heal the wounds
And stop the pain
But the scars remain
For the rest of our lives....
To the BeautifulYou say we're beautiful,
Us who have been bullied...
But where were you while it was happening?
-I was watching-
You who say "This has to stop!",
There needs to be an end to this...
What are you doing to stop it?
-I did nothing-
It's too late now...
-I failed you-
things i don't rememberi.
what you sounded like
as my ears were forming
what dreams or secrets
you confided in me
what pressures sunk
your proud shoulders
or the first time
i caused you
where i was when i decided
that your footsteps
should be followed
that your ideals
should be made my own
on my body
as i learned the world's ways
do not align
with our hopes
when i first
how my feet dangled
every time i wasn't strong enough and
how you made the world
how you were
figuring it all out
thought that life
Toughshe looks strong, tough
at least you think she is
but then again we all know
that ignorance is bliss
you dont know her pain
sometimes you'll see it in her eyes
but she doesnt let it show
behind toughness she hides
there isnt a true smile
there isnt a true self
its what she hides behind
there isnt anything else
you think you know her truly
you may know her better than some
but you dont know the pieces lost
or all the things she's done
you dont know the lies shes told
or seen her many scars
you dont know the lonliness she feels
or the coldness of her heart
you cant see the effort
it takes to hold on
you think shes alright
when shes almost gone
she looks strong, tough
and behind it she hides
she continuously puts up walls
cause she's been hurt so many times
you think she's opened up to you
shared the pain she keeps
but she only shares a portion
the rest gives her the creeps
you wont see the tears
when she looks back on it
you wont see the pain
and you wont taste the vomit
you wont see thi
Keep in Touch!
Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More